"Oh no you don't!" says Annette, snatching it. "Please Annette, I'm not infectious."
Annette looks doubtful, but seeing Octavia's desperation, hands it over with some double-sided tape.
It sticks to her like a starfish and, beaming at us, she covers her body with her fans and rushes out.
I start up the gossip the moment she has gone. "So the trouble with Brian, Octavia tells me, is that he's afraid of 'going south'. He claims it's because he likes to see her beautiful face."
Annette laughs so hard I have to loosen her corset strings. "Oh sure, Octavia may be pretty but he's clearly attempting to flatter his way out of it."
Octavia's music ends and she bursts back into the dressing room with a look of fright on her face. "What's the matter? Did your DIY C-string fall off?" asks Annette.
"No," says Octavia ripping off the starfish pastie with a noise that makes us wince. "Brian's girlfriend was in the audience - smiling and whooping at me with no idea that I'm bonking her boyfriend. I feel so guilty."
"Oh dear," I say sympathetically, "He should feel guilty, not you."
The door creaks open. "Octavia you were a star!" breathes Brian, and backs out again.
Annette is in fits. She grabs Octavia's pastie and whacks it firmly back into its place. "If only you'd give her star more attention and stop looking at her face."
