Golden Globes host Jo Koy tanked last night — these were the most most awkward moments

In his defence, Jo Koy only had ten days to prepare — as he shouted at the crowd after his quip about Barbie’s “big boobies” resulted in boos and popstar Selena Gomez groaning loudly in disbelief into her hands. 

The comparatively unknown Filipino American stand-up comedian stepped up to host the 2024 Golden Globes after a number of high-profile comedians, like Chris Rock and Ali Wong, reportedly turned down the gig. Due to the ongoing writers’ and actors’ strike, which unexpectedly ended in November, many were fearful of the lack of prep time left to write the ceremony monologue. Not Koy, who spent his Christmas binge watching Barbenhiemer and hastily jotting down jokes, which he gloated to the unimpressed audience. 

“I loved Oppenheimer. I just got one complaint: [It] needed another hour, because I felt like it needed some more backstory. My New Year’s resolution for 2024 is to finish Oppenheimer in 2025. I love Oppenheimer — especially the first season.” As the camera cut to a solemn Christopher Nolan. 

Koy prevailed: “The key moment in Barbie is when she goes from perfect beauty to bad breath, cellulite, and flat feet — or what casting directors call ‘character actor.’” It was at this point that the crowd had started booing. Barbie actor Margot Robbie and director Greta Gerwig painfully gritted their teeth and smiled through the cringe-inducing quip. While Ryan Gosling didn’t even attempt niceties, staring point-blankly at Koy. “If you’re wondering if that played as bad in the room as it (probably) did on TV, the answer is yes,” Vanity Fair’s David Canfield wrote on Twitter. “I mostly saw eyes darting around tables in confusion, wondering if they were supposed to be laughing.”

Throughout the night he continued to offend nearly every nominee — Taylor Swift included. “The big difference between the Golden Globes and the NFL? At the Golden Globes, we have fewer camera shots of Taylor Swift!” He said in reference to the singer’s new boyfriend, NFL star Travis Kelce. The camera then panned to Swift, who icily sipped her champagne looking utterly unamused by the quip. “I swear, there's more to go to here. Sorry about that,” Koy stumbled, picking up on the frosty reception. 

Koy also took aim at the royal family, making multiple swipes throughout the evening. “Succession has nine nominations — a great series about a rich, white dysfunctional family, all scheming... oh no that's The Crown, sorry,” he started. Crickets. “How great was Imelda Staunton in The Crown? Her portrayal was so great, Prince Harry called her and asked her for money,” he continued to the silent crowd.

Just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse, he turned to penis jokes. More specifically, Saltburn’s Barry Keoghan’s being “the real star of the show”.

Unfortunately it appeared the host knew he was tanking. “You want a perfect monologue? Yo, shut up. You’re kidding me, right? Slow down. I wrote some of these, and they’re the ones you’re laughing at,” floundered Koy mid-way through the excruciating monologue, seemingly throwing his writers under the bus after a 148-day strike where they campaigned for better pay and more recognition. Honestly, you can't make this up.