Hey, you get outta my face

We all get a little hot under the collar from time to time. But imagine the sheer hell of being both famous and incandescent with rage. A run-of-the-mill snit in Bond Street becomes a full-on photo fest. A mild attack of vindictive bile in Bluewater becomes national news. Now what about being Naomi Campbell? Even worse. You can't set foot in the street without some squirt of a paparazzo leaping out from behind a hedge and taking your picture. They know you struggle with 'anger issues'. So what if you make your money by having your photo taken? That's in a studio with 12 people telling you how fantastic you look. We should be sympathising with the poor old London celebrities. They have to deal with the same pressures as ordinary people (late buses, crowded Tubes, paying the rent... OK, not those, but gridlocked roads and bad hair days are no respecters of celebrity status). On top of that, they have all the famous-person stuff to deal with (rude photographers, inept publicists, Michael Parkinson). It's surprising they keep their tempers as often as they do. And, of course, they have their favourite places in which to lose it...

Outside Chinawhite As Jeremy Irons knows, Chinawhite can get quite lively. You never know when you're going to have an innocent kiss rudely interrupted by a furious brawl.

Near the Portland Hospital Liam's new favourite place for a dust-up - when there's a photographer in the vicinity.

In West London Ruby Wax knew how to deal with roadworks when she got stuck on her way to the BBC. Reportedly, she got out of her car, screamed blue murder at a workman and hurled offending traffic cones into the gutter. Nice.

Outside Kabaret If you've sold a story about the Beckham/Adams family to a tabloid recently, avoid Dane Bowers - he tends to get protective. All hell broke loose when he and Noel Imber (kiss-and-tell former lover of Louise Adams) met outside Kabaret in the small hours.

Outside Attica Jay Kay reportedly went berserk at two female fans, tried to punch a photographer and - as his car pulled away - it is alleged a vodka bottle came flying out and smashed the rear window of a parked car.

In the Wilton Arms, Knightsbridge. Billie and Chris Evans had their first big row here. Apparently, he wasn't giving her enough attention so she burst into tears, stormed out, came back, burst into tears again - and then he went to the Groucho (as you do).

On the catwalk: Kate Moss and Alexander McQueen didn't mind who noticed (Bono, Wyclef Jean, Naomi, Elle) when they had a major tiff on the runway in Barcelona. Maybe London Fashion Week should make this an annual event - it works for the Q Awards.

On stage at Earls Court: Madge was less than happy when her wig slipped off, mid-show. How long will it take her stylist to stop having nightmares about wig tape, do we think?

At Bluewater Posh got upset when she thought a shop was selling fake Becks autographs. Despite the owner's attempts to convince her of their authenticity, she bombarded him with expletives before demanding that other shoppers boycott the store.

In a car outside Claridge's We're all desperate to know what Madonna and Guy Ritchie were fighting about just before they pulled up. Maybe he'd worn that beige tank top again.

In a Chelsea street When Paul Treadway tried to snap Naomi leaving her boyfriend's house, she went bonkers. 'She launched into me,' he said. 'She was calling me scum, saying, "I hope you die".' Sometimes hard to know what Naomi's thinking, isn't it?