Watch out for squigglers

13 April 2012

Like all the best wordless gestures, the Timeform squiggle (?) is both emotive and internationally understood. Hated by trainers and owners, loved by punters - it tells you a horse, for reasons physical or psychological, can't be trusted to play to its full ability.

But whisper it, won't you - better insult someone's wife than his thoroughbred.

Since 1947, the Timeform organisation has attempted to gauge the "merit and character" of horses using a ratings system expressed in pounds. The spectrum ranges from the worst, rated at around 20, to the best in training, rated from 130 to 145.

Based in Halifax, the company produces weighty annuals assessing the performances of every horse to set foot that season on a racecourse in Britain and beyond, as well as weekly editions of comments and statistics.

Now more than just a punter's bible, Timeform ratings are invoked by stud farms promoting their stallions or auction houses advertising their wares as tangible evidence of a horse's ability. But that's if it's good news.

The awarding of a squiggle - the section mark used to mark out paragraphs in antiquated textbooks - is guaranteed to enrage, prompting a hail of indignant phonecalls to Timeform, offering a wealth of reasons for this and that poor run. "He's not really ungenuine," the conversation always begins, "it's just . . ."

It's a known fact that when Josh Gifford, the National Hunt trainer, received his copy of the 1982/83 Chasers And Hurdlers annual and found one of his inmates, Royal Judgement, to have a squiggle alongside his numerical rating, he threw all £60-odd worth straight in the fire.

"It's frustrating when one of your horses is given a squiggle because it upsets the owners," said Gifford.

"Every owner thinks his or her horse is wonderful. Then you get someone who doesn't even know the horse, who watches it from the grandstand or sits in front of the TV at home, perhaps with their eyes shut, saying it's ungenuine. I think it's very unkind.

"The horse might put its head up or get tired and then has to live with that symbol next to its name. It takes a long time for it to get rid of a squiggle. I take no notice. It's just someone's opinion."

Gifford should know a squiggler when he sees one - he trained the enigmatic Vodkatini to win the 1988 Grand Annual Chase at the Cheltenham Festival. Kicked out of Nicky Henderson's yard for being unmanageable, this best-loved rogue - Gifford prefers the word "character" - trod that typically fine line between brilliance and mule. He had the ability to whip round at the start, begin a fence behind his field and still win. Eventually, he exercised his right not to race and was duly awarded with the ultimate anti-accolade, the double squiggle. Like he cared.

You've got to love these 'twicers' - the likes of Percys Lass, who actually went to the trouble of being loaded into the starting-stalls before standing motionless, her jockey a vainly whirling dervish, watching her rivals backsides' disappear over the horizon. But if you trouble to list a few recipients of the squiggle, you may find yourself wishing you owned one or two. Shantou and Moonax, St Leger winners of 1996 and 1994, both boasted the suffix. In the 1950s, Zucchero and Auriban reached the dizzy heights of 133 - the best rating ever achieved by squiggle recipientson the Flat. It's logical that a greater proportion of National Hunt horses should carry the sign than their Flat counterparts - generally speaking, their careers last longer, giving them more time to work out the loafer's theory of maximum lifestyle, minimum effort.

Yet again, talent walks hand in hand with truculence - Beech Road, Morley Street, Little Bay, Last Suspect, Derring Rose, Bird's Nest, Gaye Brief, Bregawn, Connaught Ranger, Brown Chamberlain, Norton's Coin, Pridwell, Escartefigue. It reads like a cast-list for the Cheltenham and Aintree Festivals, for Gold Cups, Champion Hurdles and Grand Nationals, yet they were squigglers all.

Trainers can take comfort from this and the fact consistent inconsistency is required before a squiggle is awarded. Timeform are keen to stress the squiggle doesn't always mean a horse is deemed temperamentally unsound

An on-course Timeform reporter will suggest a squiggle, but it won't go to print unless ratified by the senior reporters and the editorial board. But - be warned - it's a slippery slope. It can start with an awkwardly carried head or flatback ears. So behave yourself Munir when you run in this Saturday's Celebration Mile at Goodwood. It continues with "may have her share of temperament" (Relish The Thought), and "remains best treated with a degree of caution" ( Dalampour). It ends with "irresolute tail-flasher" (Mungo Park).

Yes, the symbol may dismay connections and repel punters, but this sport would lose much of its charm without its squigglers.

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