Maradona for Scotland

Junior now plays in the youth ranks of the club, languishing near the bottom of Italy's Second Division, Serie B.

The appearance of Maradona Jnr at Clyde would be a massive boost for an outfit with an average attendance of less than 1,500.

Indeed the biggest attendance Clyde ever boasted was at its former stadium - a 21,000 crowd for a David Cassidy pop concert there in 1974.

Commercial manager Davie McKinnon conceded that the financial spin-offs of a Maradona arrival would be substantial.

'Unbelievable' was the word he actually used. But he stressed that negotiations were 'at a tentative stage'.

One potential fan who is unlikely to buy a ticket to Broadwood is Maradona Senior. The former world Number One, now aged 42, spends his time playing golf in Cuba and fighting weight problems.

Young Diego was reportedly conceivedin a 48-second romp with Cristiana Sinagra (a record surpassed only by Boris Becker and a Russian waitress in a broom cupboard). Maradona Senior refused to admit paternity but a court decided in 1992 that the boy was his son - and ordered him to pay maintenance.

According to his mother, who acts as his manager, the boy was messing around with a football before he could even walk.

Other familiar traits came through later - he failed to turn up for a photocall promotion to record his first scheduled public appearance in a Napoli shirt. 'Just like his father,' one of the club directors complained.

Soon afterwards, the boy declared: 'I want to be a champion like my father. I want to play for Napoli and Argentina. When I play against England I'll score two goals - one with my foot, one with my hand.'

Cristiana said: 'Diego is a great follower of British football. His favourite player is David Beckham. He says he is the greatest player in the world.

'I can confirm there has been interest from Scotland and this has not only pleased myself but has pleased Diego as well.'

Such promising tales, however, have a habit of falling flat.

In the early 1980s Dumbarton, an unglamorous Scottish second division club, were reported to be on the brink of signing Johan Cruyff, the Dutch master and World Cup legend. 'Cruyff For Boghead', screamed the headlines (Boghead being the home ground, not an insult to the Dutch).

More recently Maradona Senior was said to be bound for Dundee.

Scholars of the game will note that both these scoops somehow evaporated into the Scottish mist.

And last night Vincenzo Coscia, youth team coach at Napoli, told the Mail: 'We have no intention of offering Diego Maradona Jr to any club.'

Oh well. Once more, it seems as if only divine intervention will settle it. Meanwhile, Maradona Jr is appropriately non- committal about his career and his future, although many will find his words uncannily familiar. 'Only God knows what I will be,' he says.