Hello, hello - that's sh*t

To unsuspecting tourists, he will look like one of them as they gaze at Niagara Falls, the Eiffel Tower or the Great Wall of China.

But they are in for a shock if they say: 'Isn't that a wonderful vista?'

Trigger Happy TV prankster Dom Joly will shout back - in the way he yelled 'Hello' at his giant phone - 'That is sh*t.'

His new catchphrase will sweep Britain when World Shut Your Mouth begins on BBC1 in January, he predicted yesterday.

A regular will be 'Michael the Human Onion', charging children 50p to see him. 'Another main character is a 6ft turd,' said Joly. 'A guy on the crew took a photo of his cat's turd and they made a model of it.'

He admitted the producer was wary of his ideas at first. 'She said, "You want us to fly you all around the world just to say, 'That is sh*t'?" But that's what we've done.' It remains to be seen whether Joly's venture will prove a hit with viewers. His critically panned BBC3 chat show was axed after six months.