Fling or Ring? Britney and Kevin

AKA: Navel-baring, style-free Kaballah-lovin' pop superstar — formerly a virginous Baptist church-going good girl

Years racked up: 22 — although she's packed a lot in

Known for?: Singing a string of pop hits, dating Justin Timberlake and getting dumped when she cheated on him, being Madonna's New Best Friend, behaving in an increasingly erratic manner of late (crying on TV, getting married in Vegas, crying in public, cancelling her tour...)

Is involved in a love thing with...

Who? Kevin Federline

AKA: That dancer bloke

Years racked up: 26

Known for?: Er, being Britney's dancer.

Romance rocketed when:Sparks flew two months ago between the toe-tapping pair — and now Britney, who's not known for her careful and considered behaviour, has already moved him into her LA mansion, got matching tattoos and reportedly got engaged.

Make or break: Kevin isn't just a good-looking hunk of Justin Timberlake-ness — he's also a daddy. His ex-girlfriend, actress Shar Jackson is currently heavily pregnant with their second child. Whoops.

Soppy speak:'If you want to be my lover, you've got to get used to this,' Britney is said to have giggled to Kevin after paparazzo followed them in the early days. He's obviously not found it a problem. Yet.

Biz Bitch says: Britney is gradually morphing into one hell of a car-crash-celebrity — and it's fascinating to watch. This relationship is going too fast, too soon, but we love it! Britney, love, do us a favour, marry him and then reveal all when it inevitably goes wrong...