EastEnders

8pm, BBC1

Poor Kat (Jessie Wallace). Will she stand by and watch her husband get beaten to a pulp by Evil Andy's non-speaking henchpersons, or will she agree to the breathless gangster's sordid sexual proposal and clear her debts without paying a visit to the cashpoint?

After much deliberation and a truly frightening make-up job (there's so much navy goo above her eyes that it appears Kat has chosen the "being duffed up" option), she turns up at Andy's door.

Andy is, of course, a soap hardman, so expect plenty of yelling and threat-delivering before any bedroom-based business is discussed. And Kat, underneath the eyeliner, really does look like a frightened bunny. Quite rightly - Andy is one of the least pleasant Stenders characters ever.

As such, Kat, surely you don't expect him to wipe the slate clean and not record evidence of any coupling? How many times do you need telling? He's a bad man. He's a bad man who wants a film to keep. (Well, he did in the tape I watched, but perhaps it will have been edited, post-GranthamGate...)