What's on the beauty agenda for 2018

You know about environmental aggressors. But what about digital aggressors, as identified by Victoria Buchanan of The Future Laboratory. ‘We need to combat our digital habits,’ she says. ‘Expect to see more protective solutions and services.’ After all, we spend more time in front of a screen than we do under the sun. And again, you’ve heard of the T-Zone; well, welcome to the Y-Zone. This is the lower-face, throat and décolletage that is constantly compromised when we scrunch up to look down at our phones up to 150 times a day. Hello tech neck. See YSL’s Beauty’s Y-Zone skincare launches and also FaceGym’s Phone Face package, which specifically targets Instagram addicts. You know who you are. #stressed

ATLANTIC INVASION

Glossier has landed from New York — consider the floodgates opened. Americana is the new Koreana when it comes to fresh and relevant beauty conversations. Silicon Valley tech advances combined with California’s wellness obsession and New York’s hustle has birthed a flurry of brands arriving here soon. Milk make-up (from the loins of splashy photography studio, Milk) is hip as hell, with blotting paper in Rizla-style packets, lipstains that look like marker pens and cutie blush oils. Drunk Elephant is ‘clean-clinical’, non-irritating skincare with a trouble-shooting attitude in naïve, nursery-style packaging. Its TLC Sukari Babyfacial is a monumental sell-out, stuffed as it is with a whopping 25 per cent of AHAs, including glycolic acid, for a smoothing anti-wrinkle effect. Do not use this on a baby.

FEEL ULTRASONIC

Do you have a nose for the future? Cosmetic surgeon Jag Chana has pioneered a rhinoplasty (nose job) technique that uses ultrasound rather than scalpels. Ultrasonic energy can sculpt the nose with extreme precision while reducing swelling, bruising and downtime. Post-Brexit vote, we are seeing a vogue for more conservative lifestyle choices as people become increasingly change-wary. So less house-selling, more house-renovation. Less full-on surgery and more non-invasive tweakments.

GO MINIMAL

How many serums? How many masks, acids and oils can one person cope with? If product fatigue is setting in, turn your attention towards skincare with a capsule wardrobe mentality. Simplicity is set to be the mot de 2018. Say hello to London-born brand Lixir with its ‘must-do’ trio of vitamin C paste, Universal Emulsion and Electrogel Cleanser. These three wonders — partnered with three highly active night-time ‘molecule’ serums — are it. Expect more cleverly edited propositions to land imminently.

VEG OUT

Say what you like about vegans but we are in full-blown ingredient fear right now. Combine that with a widely felt need to put cash in the karma bank and vegan beauty is wiggling its way to the front line. People now actually read those tiny, Latin-y ‘INCI’ listings on the back of lotions and potions, each ingredient more impenetrable than the last. So fad-tastically hempy vegan preaching has given way to a meaningful movement towards a transparently animal-friendly protocol. Even the biggest brands are having to listen to the consumer who makes a noise online. So watch out for vegan and cruelty-free superbrands such as edgy Kat Von D, brow supremo Anastasia Beverly Hills, super-glam Illamasqua, skin-coverage sensation Cover FX, make-up brush initiative Eco Tools and wait for the universe to throw some blessings in your direction…

GO CRYPTO

The beauty industry has always been daring and now, it seems, it is encouraging bitcoin owners to open their online wallets and kickstart the future of payment. Historically, cryptocurrency has been rumoured to favour drugs, arms and other dodgy commodities, but… it’s sick of that life of crime and is going straight. Lush and Sephora have both started accepting bitcoin payment which, by the way, is unaffected by global currency fluctuations. So, if there were, say, a disastrous election or referendum result that saw the value of, say, the British pound plummet, you could shop at international retailers without paying twice as much as locals. Every cloud, guys.

USE YOUR LOAF

Bread. Hello old friend. But no. But yes. But no. The past 10 years have not been kind to gluten. It makes you fat, they say. It makes you wrinkly, they say. And spotty. And bloated… in the face. Sexy. Anyway, whether or not you subscribed to that demonisation, here comes a supplement to level the playing field. Tribitor comes in a sachet, dissolves in water and promises to reduce the insulin spike that sugar in bread can cause, as well as counteracting the sugar-led glycation process that threatens to break down much-needed collagen while causing acne. It’ll help with booze bloat too. This, I’m sure you’ll agree, is truly excellent news.

JOIN THE GREEN PARTY

Is Generation Green the new Millennial Pink? Hmmm. If you ask Pantone it might soon be all about Nile Green and Forest Green. First of all, green is nicely gender neutral (phew) and it also chimes conveniently with the eco/vegan/Mother Earth conversation. So far, so well done us. There’s green packaging springing up left, right and centre, notably Soaper Duper, which is fully recycled (made from the tops of your discarded semi-skimmed milk bottles), completely free of nasties, cheap and properly delicious. But will green hair replace pink hair? And will creams go green, and what about green lipstick? Why the hell not?

TRAIN LIKE THE ELITE

We are all fully sold on the idea that strong is the new skinny. But a crucial ingredient in maintaining and increasing strength and stamina is going to be injury-proofing. I mean, you can’t do your yearly iron man with a dodgy knee, now can you? Say hello to the AlterG anti-gravity treadmill at Pure Sports Medicine and their four London city clinics, which uses air pressure to reduce your running bodyweight by 80 per cent, so you can hone in on technique and reduce strain on joints. Meanwhile, pre-workout cryotherapy at boutique health club KXU helps to promote faster recovery. So, no excuse now, people. No excuse. Ready, steady… BOOM.

JOIN THE ZZZ LIST

Who sleeps? Here’s the good news: it is apparently a modern construct that we need eight hours of continuous sleep to function fully. What we need is (here’s the great news) naps. Seize every napportunity and proceed until apprehended. Naps are the green juices of circadian rhythm. This Works, famed for its sleep sprays, is poised to enter the realm of power napping — short sleeps that help you wake up feeling a million dollars. Nap pods are popping up all over and my website, The Midult, is launching The Lying Down Club at the transformed John Lewis bed department (6pm-8pm, 29-30 Nov; thelyingdownclub.com). Think linen porn, sound-reducing headphones and foot massages. Like the quiet bit at the end of yoga. Without the torture. Or the chanting. But I’ll be there if you feel like a chat…