The new wags - London's gone barking mad

It's hard to believe, but there was a time when Deryk our Yorkshire terrier didn't have much of a social life. Whenever he went to a restaurant, he had to be smuggled in and hidden under the table in his bag. When taking a taxi, he was hastily disguised under a scarf, like a canine Salman Rushdie. His only corres-pondence came from the vet, and his idea of dining out was finding a chicken bone under a bench. How times have changed.

Dogs have become celebrated across London, and a welter of social fixtures now fills Deryk's diary: competitions and dressing-up parties, detox sessions and dog spa visits. He's become so accustomed to champagne corks, he doesn't even squeak when they pop. He regularly brings home goodie bags containing meaty mini-eclairs, collar corsages and even, once, a diamanté 'D' for Deryk.

On one occasion, a personal invitation to a Mulberry fashion show was biked to his home address. The envelope was bigger than he was. He took time out from his busy schedule touring local lampposts to attend. He was seated in the front row, naturally, where he admired the collection of Fair Isle angora dog jumpers - and got a tickle from the heavenly Gemma Arterton.

Deryk's celebrity lifestyle has not gone to his head, however. He has never expressed a desire to bring about world peace or bring out his own fragrance. He remains totally grounded. Hard to be otherwise when you are barely a foot tall and cannot jump on to the sofa unaided. In truth, it can't be said that Deryk really knows how to behave around celebrities. He once saw Russell Brand in the street, rushed up to him and started pawing his trouser leg, like a small furry groupie. When Russell, an animal lover who is devoted to his cat Morrissey, kindly lifted Deryk up to give him a kiss, Deryk got carried away (responding, perhaps, to Russell's famous pheromones) and tried to stick his tongue in. This was, luckily, before Katy Perry was on the scene. 'Well, I enjoyed that,' said Russell, as Deryk immediately abandoned him and bounced off down the street to greet his friend Ron, who, at 78, is the oldest milkman in London. 'In the Western world!' exclaims Ron, while giving Deryk a pat.

Deryk is only half the size of a Moon Boot but he is all heart. Wherever he goes, children (and sometimes adults) point and squeal with delight. A loyal, steady little fellow, he is motivated entirely by love; separated from his owner Annie (my mother) he goes into a decline, watches the door and won't eat or drink. He is a little sniff of heaven, and brings happiness wherever he goes. It is about time that he and his kind are welcomed across the capital.

Dogs are already honoured guests in 191 London pubs (download the new Kennel Club-approved app 'Dog Friendly' to find them, along with comments such as 'The Prince of Wales, Highgate - sometimes more dogs than people' etc) and there are signs that restaurants are tentatively following suit. 'Yes, he can come in, if he's very good and stays in his bag,' said the concierge at Soho House, as Deryk stared gratefully up at him.

'Dogs are good for business,' says a spokesperson for The Kennel Club. 'They help lift morale in the workplace and increase productivity.' The Kennel Club is launching a major 'Open For Dogs' campaign this summer, backed by Alan Duncan MP and Matthew Offord MP, who recently invoked the Human Rights Act when he wasn't allowed to bring his Jack Russell, Max, to the House of Commons with him, saying, 'He's great for taking the stress out of my day.'

Ten thousand workplaces, beaches, hotels and campsites across the UK are officially registered dog-friendly, and even a high street bank: Metro Bank offers dog treats and water bowls at every counter. In May it hosted a 'Dogs Rule' open weekend in which branches held paw-reading sessions, 'adoptathons' run by Battersea Dogs & Cats Home, and a puppy disco. Metro Bank's founder Vernon Hill, American banking mogul and doting owner of a Yorkie called Duffy (properly Lord Duffield), told me his philosophy: 'Let's be open, let's be friendly, and let's give every customer a dog bowl to take home with them.' Lord Duffield, who sometimes travels by bag ('he has a very exquisite bag'), used to be banned from banks by security guards, which inspired Hill to pioneer his open-door policy. Metro Bank even puts an extra £20 into an account opened by a customer who brings their dog along with them - could it be that people who own dogs make better banking customers? 'I can't say, but I do know that it's great fun and creates a good environment.'

The Wimbledon Championships came under pressure to join the ranks of the dog-friendly this year as Men's champion Novak Djokovic, attempting to secure a courtside spot for his beloved snowy white poodle Pierre, took negotiations to 'the highest level'. Pierre is perhaps the archetypal new celebridog. He has been spotted out to dinner with Novak in Paris, being fed noodles while sitting on a cushion by the table. He appeared with his master on the July cover of Italy's L'Uomo Vogue, and has thousands of followers on Twitter, where he chats with fellow self-styled 'Wimbledog' Maggie May, Andy Murray's Border terrier. Harmless, playful doggy banter is very much the thing on Twitter: perfect for keeping things light and silly; personal, but at one remove. Pierre's tweets included 'Being Pierre is the best. Woof!' and in reference to his Vogue cover: 'Fame has clearly gone to my head. Form an orderly queue for paw-tographs, please.'

Dogs are 'doing' the season in style this year. Jaeger recently launched its £750 Pooch Tote, made of nude leather with gold detailing. And the stars of Marc Jacobs' A/W campaign for Louis Vuitton are two imperious Japanese Chins. Actress Sheridan Smith's black pug Barry recently shared his wardrobe dilemmas on Twitter (blue bovver cap or pink sunhat?) before having 'a huge diva strop and storming off to his chaise longue'. He was, after all, on his way to a big date: London's first gay dog show - reaching out to pets of all persuasions. London's Pride Pooch 2011 event, in association with Battersea Dogs & Cats Home, commended 30 dogs from LGBT backgrounds, while the overall winner, a Battersea rescue Staffie called Skipper, rode through London at the head of a float playing soul music, to huge cheers from the crowd.

Across London at Kensington Palace, a rather different kind of competition was taking place as a panel judged which dog 'Queen Victoria would most like to take home with her'. The answer was Arrow, a beautifully presented Old English Sheepdog. The Dashing Dogs event, organised in association with the Dog Trust and Dogs Today magazine, was held on the Kensington Palace Orangery lawns and dubbed 'the canine society event of the year' by the Daily Mail. It attracted 200 dogs dressed as Victorian gentry: the hotly contested category of 'Best Dressed Victorian on six legs' was carried off by Roxy the Rottweiler, who matched her owner in a boater, tippet and homemade bloomers. A Chinese crested dog called Mugley, crowned Britain's ugliest dog in 2005, turned up wearing a pink cape and clinched the 'Loveable Rogue' prize - even though, as everyone knows, Mugley is happily married to Lola the Yorkshire terrier, whom he wed at a lavish ceremony in Essex earlier this year (estimated to be the world's most expensive dog wedding at £20,000).

The Dashing Dog show was in aid of the £12 million Kensington Palace renovation project, which plans to transform visitor access. 'We want to put Queen Victoria, Prince Albert and their beloved spaniel Dash at the heart of the project, with an exhibition about them next year,' an officer from Historic Royal Palaces told me. Queen Victoria is said to have composed Dash's memorial herself: 'His attachment was without selfishness, his playfulness without malice, his fidelity without deceit,' it reads. 'Reader, if you would live beloved and die regretted, profit by the example of Dash.'