My London - Polly Morgan

Polly's taxidermied animal art works sell for up to £30,000 to clients who include Kate Moss, Harry Handelsman and Courtney Love...

Home is...
Bethnal Green. I've barely set foot in West London.

What was the last play you saw in London?
Hamlet. Jude Law is a friend. I was terrified he'd be bad and I'd have to lie throughout dinner afterwards, but he was really very good.

Where did you last go on holiday?
I stayed with friends in Jamaica, near Montego Bay, in June. It was a great antidote to London; peaceful and slow. Before that I stayed for a week with my friend Amanda Eliasch at her house in St Tropez with Tracey Emin and my boyfriend Mat Collishaw.

What advice would you give a tourist?
Stop squashing me with your backpacks and tripping me up with your wheelie suitcases.

Which London shops do you rely on?
The Decor Store and Travis Perkins on Bethnal Green Road for tools, paint, glue and wood. I ransack Les Chiffoniers every time I need to scrub up. The 4D modelshop on Leman Street, E1, is great for all things miniature. Lock & Davies in Hackney is a cheap, efficient framer.

What's the best meal you've had in London?
My first meal at St John about seven years ago: it was the start of a love affair with offal.

What's your earliest London memory?
Church services taken by my grandfather, Reverend Chandos Morgan, who was the vicar at St Margaret Lothbury in the City.

What would be on your tombstone?
I haven't finished yet.

What are your guilty pleasures?
Swedish Polly chocolates from Ikea and getting drunk and singing along to The Smiths and Britney Spears.

What are you most afraid of?
Motorway driving. It started as mild anxiety and is now full-blown panic attacks. I wrote to Derren Brown, who is a taxidermy fan, offering him a piece of work to sort me out. He ignored me.

What would you do as Mayor for the day?
Follow Ken Livingstone around and interrupt him, contradicting everything he says, as he does to Boris, who outwits him at every turn.

What's your life philosophy?
Stop talking about it and get on with it.

What animal would you most like to be?
A turtle, because they live for centuries.

What was the last album you bought?
The Noisettes, as I used to be friends with Shingai, the singer, when I was younger - she's more talented than the rest of the chart put together.