It might be convenient to get your 10kms in, while gassing to the ten friends you roped in to your ‘human centipede’ idea for the marathon, but pavements don’t expand to accommodate such initiatives. Two’s a couple. Ten… is a riot.
2. Spit
This might seem fairly obvious, but many people do it. When expelled at high speed, phlegm has only one place to go...
3. Run with your dog
Racing a tooth-bearing, excited terrier towards an unsuspecting innocent jogger is the bright idea of no one bright. Giving little Algie his ‘walkies’ as you merrily run alongside him, might seem like a good plan in theory – killing two birds with one stone – but spare a thought for the runners ahead. Because you might end up killing them also.
20 Instagrams for fitness motivation
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4. Judge someone’s ability by their gear
Old-timers are just as likely to be wearing a tracksuit from the 80s, as they are, a pair of Nike Y20 Track Running Trousers. Trying to overtake ‘grandpa’ in his sweatpants might turn into a sudden, and terrifying, battle of wills; one that has you sprinting round the park until you're all puffed out, only to see ‘grandpa’ breeze by with no sweat.
5. Cross into the bicycle lane
Cyclists and pedestrians get along just fine... when there are fine lines to divide them. Ignoring an allocated pathway – like a cycling lane – is to cross the all-important dividing line. And when a runner does that, they will hear this: 'You crossed the line! You crossed the line!' Crossed lines are a bit like cross humans: best avoided.