Which is Wills and which is Harry? Kendall is Wills, the heir apparent desperate for daddy’s approval. Roman is the immature brat who can’t stop shooting his mouth off. His fixation with colleague Gerri also echoes Harry losing his virginity to an older woman - although their flirtation plays out in boardrooms and hotel suites, rather than a field behind a pub.
JR vs Bobby Ewing
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JR vs Bobby Ewing
They might not be properly blue-blooded but the Dallas siblings were oil barons, at least. They were forever battling for parental favouritism and control of family firm Ewing Oil, while their glossy-haired wives competitively power-dressed and exchanged dirty looks across Kensington Palace. Sorry, Southfork Ranch.
Which is Wills and which is Harry? William is JR, the ruthless charmer who inherits the company. Harry is the altruistic moderniser. Like Bobby, he’s probably hoping to wake up and realise it was all a bad dream.
Mufasa vs Scar
Hamlet-inspired Disney classic The Lion King depicts the murderous rivalry between noble Mufasa and his power-hungry younger brother. Sly, bitter Scar plots to kill first Mufasa, then cub prince Simba, so he can seize the Pride Lands throne for himself. Luckily he’s defeated and torn to pieces by hyenas. Well, it’s the Circle Of Life. Or something.
Which is Wills and which is Harry? Both princes have thinning manes but William is king of the jungle, while Harry lazes and schemes in the sun. Perhaps the princes should sing “Hakuna Matata”, man-hug and make up.
The Hound vs The Mountain
The two most feared warriors in Westeros were Sandor “The Hound” Clegane and his elder brother Gregor, aka “The Mountain”. The hirsute hulks hated one another since boyhood, when sadistic Gregor shoved Sandor’s face into a fire during a squabble over toys. Game Of Thrones fans demanded a duel, dubbed “Cleganebowl” by meme-makers. In the much-maligned final season, they got their wish. Result? Both died but The Hound did so heroically.
Which is Wills and which is Harry? Hard to say but forget broken necklaces and dog bowls. We’re talking gouged eyes and crushed skulls. In those skirts and with winter coming, don’t rule out a frostbitten penis either.
Ed vs David Milliband
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Ed vs David Miliband
Who needs Buckingham Palace when we’ve got the Palace of Westminster? Elder sibling David, widely seen as the more gifted politician, was hot favourite to win the 2010 Labour leadership race - until brother Ed decided to run against him. Union backing propelled the bacon sarnie-scoffer to a shock narrow win.
Which is Wills and which is Harry? David might be the elder brother but he’s Harry, having resigned as an MP and moved to the US in a huff.
Thor vs Loki
Marvel
Thor vs Loki
Avengers and princely parallels assemble. One of the standout relationships in the seemingly endless Marvel universe is the enmity between Thor, the God of Thunder and King of Asgard, and his trickster little brother. Loki actor Tom Hiddleston has described it as “like King Lear but nastier”.
Which is Wills and which is Harry? As heir to Odin’s throne, golden boy Thor is basically William with bigger biceps, more hair and a hammer. Meanwhile, “God of mischief” Loki is a jealous narcissist with his own streaming TV show. Remind you of anyone?
Michael vs Fredo Corleone
AP
Michael vs Fredo Corleone
Not to be confused with the Cadbury’s chocolate frog (he has two Ds), Fredo was the weak, womanising middle brother in The Godfather’s crime family. When young buck Michael was made Don, resentful Fredo betrayed him to gangland rivals. Realising Fredo was the traitor (“I know it was you. You broke my heart”), Michael delivered the kiss of death - although he tactfully waited until their mother was dead to order his brother’s execution.
Which is Wills and which is Harry? Well, only one of them “went against the family”. Perhaps Harry should check for horse’s heads at bedtime.