Why has Green been so public?

I AM GETTING withdrawal symptoms. A week has gone by and I have not seen an article about Philip Green in The Sunday Times or Daily Mail, where he is usually guaranteed an appearance.

There was a time, if I bumped into him in a restaurant, or even in the boardroom at Spurs, he would have a little chinwag with me about this, that or the other. I cannot say we were ever great buddies but recently when I bumped into him at the Dorchester, I got a very regal down-your-nose look and was then ignored. This must be because he is worth £1.3bn and feels he does not have to talk to anyone unless they are in the top 30 of the Sunday Times rich list.

For someone who has expressed his dislike of the City, lawyers, brokers and institutions, I find it bizarre that a couple of weeks ago he publicly announced the results of his company Bhs when, of course, there is no real reason to do so. It is a private company. Why, one asks, does somebody who dislikes the pomp and circumstance of the City so much publicly announce company results when he does not have to? His close buddies, the Barclay brothers, have shown it is best to keep things quiet and close to their chests.

One can only assume this is a way of letting his fans or hangers-on know what a great businessman he is. Phil, take it from this East End boy and all of your North London groupies: we love what you have done, we got the message a long time ago - you are shrewd, you are a dealmaker extraordinaire, we are all proud of you.

Perhaps he has taken a leaf out of Lord Ashcroft's book. The story is that when he made his first million he actually paid for an advert in The Times to let everyone know. I am still foxed as to why Philip has decided to wash his linen in public, as well as hinting he may take a dividend of between £100m and £200m. Perhaps he is shrewder than we think. He has got everyone thinking Bhs is worth a billion. Once the cash is out, he may decide to float and see if the company realises the price on the bar code.

If he does, can we expect the first AGM to be as lavish as his well-publicised party, with annual reports bound in the finest Versace fabric, pens by Dupont and water in crystal glasses? Whatever you do my son, when you get the first awkward question from the floor, don't tell them to f*** off and mind their own business.

It appears Philip has so impressed everyone with his skills in restructuring retail businesses, rumour has that it Sir Geoffrey Mulcahy has been heard to say he fancies doing a 'Philip Green' when he leaves Kingfisher.

Anyway, Phil, carry on impressing us all. Keep your eye on Harrods. I would love you to buy it. They once slung me out of there as a 17-year-old sales rep when I was trying to flog them some tape recorders. I might even come in on the deal with you. It's right up your alley, nice and glitzy, great place for a party. You could even change it into your UK residence. Now that would be impressive.

If you see me out next time, at least give me a nod, put out your hand for me to kiss and spare a thought for us mere fractional billionaire mortals.

Funny old game

THE Government has just woken up to the fact that digital TV is not going to be so easy to roll out. A recent survey, which probably cost an arm and a leg, found that the country is not ready - up to 50% of the population is unable to receive good signals.

Still this does not seem to deter Carlton and Granada. The licences the ITV Digital administrator gave back are up for grabs. Rumour has it that Carlton and Granada are going in for them again. If they do, we may see a new deal struck with the Football League on terms they refused before the plug was pulled. Wouldn't it be funny if the League, which by now must realise there is no other show in town, ends up selling the rights to a reformed digital TV company owned by Granada and Carlton, and only gets paid what was on the table before this whole fiasco started?

Bradford City has also called in the administrator, citing the ITV Digital crash as the villain. Rumour also has it that when the liquidator has copped his fees and needs to find a new owner, club chairman Geoffrey Richmond may try to pick up the crumbs.

Good game this. Can't pay the bills? Never mind. Call in the administrator, screw the creditors and start again. This was the practice of the East End rag trade factories many years ago. Go bust Friday night and open in the wife's name on Monday. Can't see it, though. Mrs ITV Digital - that doesn't sound right.

Sir Alan Sugar has donated his fee to charity