We can't wait to get hitched

When I'm filling in official forms, there's no marital status box that applies to me - except to say that I'm single, which I'm not. I've been with Ciro for longer than the average marriage, and it seems ridiculous in this day and age that our relationship isn't recognised by law.

Unlike our married friends, if, God forbid, Ciro was critically ill in hospital, only his next of kin and close family would be allowed to visit - I wouldn't even be able to see him. And if either of us were to die, we would be denied the finality of registering the death of the partner we love. Okay, many straight couples choose not to get married, but at least they have the choice. We don't.

Sometimes I think we are the envy of our straight friends, especially those with young children. We are a double-income couple with no kids. It's hard to pinpoint why our relationship works so well, apart from the fact that we still love each other to bits. We enjoy a nice, middle-class lifestyle and, because we have the money and no ties, we travel a lot. When we go abroad and meet other gay men, you realise how backward the laws are in Britain. Most other European countries have much better equal rights policies when it comes to same-sex couples.

Stupidly, neither of us has bothered to make a will. As our relationship isn't recognised legally, if I died tomorrow, half our house and everything I own would go to my family and not to Ciro. You hear terrible stories of gay people being forced to sell joint homes when their partner dies. We don't have the same state pension rights - my pension wouldn't automatically go to Ciro if I died. Sadly, we are not awash with cash like Elton John and David Furnish, but if we were and I wanted to give Ciro a lump sum, legally he would have to pay gift tax on it, which wouldn't be the case if we were a straight married couple.

We met in a nightclub queue. Neither of us was really into clubbing but had been dragged along by friends. I saw Ciro and was immediately taken with him. I followed him around the dance floor for ages before I eventually plucked up courage to talk.

We clicked immediately. Ciro is from Sardinia and I'm half-Italian, so we had a lot in common. We swapped phone numbers and then a week later had our first date - we went for some beers in the Piazza in Covent Garden and things progressed from there.

I was 25 and had never had a serious boyfriend, and Ciro had just come out of a relationship, so we took things slowly. I was living with a flatmate in Fulham, Ciro was sharing with two girlfriends at the Oval. I began staying over at his place more and more, until after six months we decided to buy our own place together. We found a gorgeous old house with a garden in Brixton that we could renovate.

My parents were fine about our relationship from the start. They adore Ciro. I have two older brothers who are married, and we all get together at our place for Christmas.

Ciro comes from an old Sardinian family who are very traditional. They don't acknowledge our relationship even though they know about it, but that doesn't really bother us any more.

Going to weddings and funerals can be very difficult for same-sex couples because you are thrown together with different generations and people from all walks of life. We had one friend recently who went to his father's funeral and his boyfriend had to sit at the back of the church, rather than in the front pew comforting him, because his family were worried about what people would think. And at weddings, we do feel excluded because it's something that we're denied.

We are both "out" at work and that has never been a problem. We both work in media-savvy companies - I'm a brand consultant and Ciro is a general
manager of a tour operator - and neither of us has suffered discrimination.

We're lucky, though - we have friends who work in the City who still have to deny they're gay, let alone be open about the fact that they have a partner.

Even so, it's still much easier being gay in big cities such as London because it's more cosmopolitan. Outside the major centres, it's a very different story. On weekends away, we've been called things like "dirty faggots" and "perverts", and it's so upsetting. The Lords vote last week to abolish Section 28 means that the law will soon acknowledge gay relationships as meaningful and valid. Being recognised by the law can only help change people's attitudes and make them more accepting.

The best news is that two weeks ago, the Government launched its proposal to let gay couples, such as Ciro and myself, register our partnerships. This will allow us to make our commitment to each other official in law, and will finally give us equal rights with married couples. It's not exactly legalising gay marriage - marriage is a different ceremony, under a different law - but it is as close as we can get, and a huge improvement.

The proposal isn't expected to became law until 2004, but as soon as we can, we will immediately register our relationship. It's what we have both wanted for so long. We won't have a big party to celebrate or anything as we're quite private as a couple. We will probably just pop down to our local Brixton register office.

The new law will mean that gay couples who do register will have to go through a "divorce" process to dissolve the partnership. I really think that's important, as becoming a couple is something to be taken seriously. I hope Ciro and I will be together until the day we die. But if anything were to happen to me, I want to know that Ciro is protected and seen as my next of kin. He's the love of my life, and why shouldn't he be?