My shameless showboating

When I was born, my dad wasn't by my mum's bedside, mopping her forehead. He was at home, nervously watching TV, vaguely expecting a call from the hospital at any moment. He didn't go to the nursing home the day after, either, or even the day after that.

Can you imagine a father not being there at the birth now? It's virtually unthinkable. I tell you this not to show what a bad father I had. Quite the opposite. My father has always been loving, fair, affectionate and entertainingly eccentric. But now he has observed the way I am with my children, he has confessed he feels he missed out a bit. He is fascinated at how my wife and I share duties, how our kids enhance our lives, how they come everywhere with us and haven't turned us into middle-aged stay-at-homes overnight.

Dad seems to think that us 'young men' are working to some cleverly rebranded, Blairite 'New Dad' plan, but he's wrong. I think 21st-century dads are more responsible, openly affectionate and proud mainly out of necessity. My wife works, as do most of my dad-mates' partners. We share the responsibility because the situation demands it. Of course, this hasn't stopped us from becoming shameless showboaters as dads.

I try to remember that one's children are like holidays ? fascinating to you, boring for others ? but I still break out the photos at every opportunity. I insist on changing nappies in public, I play loud rough-and-tumble games in close proximity to childless couples, I think my daughters are very bright for their ages and better looking than my mates' kids (heinous, I know), and am quietly chuffed when a toddler starts roaring and mine remains placid. I also own a pavement-hogging, off-road-capable baby-buggy imported from America, which was bought simply because Tom Cruise has one.

Does all this make me a 'New Dad'? Not really. Because, you see, in my delightful children's wide, sparkly eyes, I will always be just plain old 'Dad'.

Unfree, scared, father: Tim Lott
Neither braver nor wiser