I must, I must...

In the same way that you wouldn't buy a toupèe from a man with balding temples, you'd better have a fine pair if you're going to run a class called Boob Aerobics.

So, when Troy Dureh arrives, I'm stumped. He has an ample chest - but it's just not one we ladies can aspire to.

Luckily, the class turns out to be a two-hander; half punishing aerobics from Troy and half visualisation/positive affirmation, in the form of Lynsey (E cup) Higgs.

Boob Aerobics makes some bold boasts. Namely, to 'increase breast measurements by at least two inches and one cup size within eight classes'.

As I don't have eight classes (or small breasts) I seek out Kate (32B) McArthur who has (and did).

She's impressed: 'My boobs definitely feel larger. A big B cup rather than a small one.

'Before I didn't think about them, now I'm proud of them. I focused on them, worked out the muscles around them and now I stand straighter to give them better vantage.'

Her voice drops: 'My boyfriend's noticed it too. And his mates.'

Feel the power

A class typically begins with Lynsey setting us an unorthodox exercise. We're asked to sense our body's energetic field with our hands.

We move red-pulsing energy in our pelvic area up through our stomach, via the sternum to park it in the chest.

Next, some motivational mantras and girl-power type visualisations - of how we'd like to see our breasts and how hard we're going to work to realise them - then it's over to Troy for some old-fashioned toil.

Exercises are exclusively targeted at the chest and upper body. You'll start with pec work - pressing hands together in prayer position to mobilise the pectoralis major muscles before moving on to reps in pairs.

One partner does anterior raises with barbells, the other does an incline/decline bench-press using increasingly heavy weights, while Troy cheers and chides from the sidelines.

'Sweat not surgery!' sang the press blurb. Catchy, cute and absolutely bloody right. After 45 minutes we close with relaxation, affirmations ('I will look at myself naked and like what I see') and some selfcongratulation.

'It's as important to work on the emotional as it is the physical,' explains Lynsey. 'In a city we live in a state of permanent adrenal arousal - fight or flight - so it's important we make space for the body and then, when it's relaxed and open to suggestion, make change.'

Science backs her claims: 'Studies show that the body can be manipulated by mental stimulus,' she claims.

'Athletes do it all the time. The way we feel about ourselves can positively affect physical, mental and chemical change.'

Feel the power

Promises of cup-increase might be premature hype (already American radio stations are clamouring for more information), but it stands to reason that pecxercise will give the breasts a lift (by working the pectoralis majoris underneath). Meanwhile creative visualisation gives more than empty padding.

It's breasts with brains. And I'm swayed, or maybe that's just my pendulous puppies.

Boob Aerobics classes at GYMBOX, 100 High Holborn, London WC1.
Tel: 020 7400 1919 or visit www.gymbox.co.uk