Go for it: Bat Walk

You may be thinking, 'Aren't bats airborne, blood-sucking rats that attack people's hairdos? Why would anyone want to spend an evening looking for them?' That's what I thought anyway. But then I figured it could be fun in a scare-yourself-shitless sort of way - a bit like watching Hitchcock's The Birds live.

I head for the Wetland Centre in Barnes at dusk expecting to find one or two goths, but I'm greeted by a 30-strong group of bat-watchers (including kids and grandmas), fully equipped with binoculars, wellies and torches. For people who are about to be exposed to the bat elements, they look rather keen. I soon discover why.

In his talk, Philip Briggs, a Wetland Centre volunteer, debunks every bat myth and throws in a couple of juicy bits just for good measure. For the record, no British bat wants to suck your blood. They'd rather have sex and feast on insects. What's more, they're not blind, they rarely live in belfries and the last thing they'd want to do is get stuck in your hair.

We're then handed bat detectors - geeky instruments that convert bat noise into humanly audible sound - and played a tape so we know what to listen out for. Britain's smallest bat, the pipistrelle, sounds like someone being slapped rather quickly, while the noctule bat is more like Moby's first attempt on the synthesiser.

We make our way to the watchtower in the middle of the wildlife reserve in near silence. I feel a bit of an anorak clutching my bat detector, but now that I know there's no danger of a bat-attack - or an Afro, for that matter - I'm eager to meet these misunderstood creatures.

'Tack, tack, tack, tack...' goes my bat detector. 'Here they come!' shouts Philip. Like kamikaze pilots they dive for their insect prey, swooping and missing the tower by an inch. 'Ooh!' and 'Aah!' say the crowd, rushing from side to side to catch a better glimpse. Before long I'm hanging out of the window, luring them with words like, 'Come to mummy, ickle batty watty.' So much for scaring myself shitless.

Big Batty Walks, Wetland Centre London, Queen Elizabeth's Walk, SW13. For details, call 020-8409 4400 or visit www.wwt.org.uk