Established in 1857, this beautiful boozer boasts curlicued frescos romping with naughty nymphs, cosy nooks and richly stained glass. Topped off with unabashedly swirly pub carpet, its grandly proportioned period interior tips just the right side of garish. Inside the upstairs dining room, it’s a different realm: neat, neutral, presentable — and soullessly bland. As you’d expect from our Gordon, the menu bristles with Britishness so we drank a pleasantly appley English reserve white wine from Chapel Down, Kent (£22.50).