A journey not a destination

The Far Side is opposite the probation office where Jeffrey Archer had to sign in after leaving chokey, which does not lend glamour to Stockwell Road. Its glamour is found under the red and green flag of the Portuguese community, which dominates this road known as Little Lisbon.

Man cannot live on vinho verde, bachalau, smoking tabs and Oporto versus Lisboa on the telly alone, exotic as this may be. Alternatively the nearest foodie pubs are up in Clapham, the nearest foodie bars are in Brixton, and somewhere in the middle lies The Far Side.

The Far Side is not a destination pub, or a Gary Larson cartoon. It's a pub for all seasons with friendly staff, food, DJs, bands, flat-screen telly, beer garden and, of course, bare floorboards. If it didn't have bare floorboards I'm not sure I would have agreed to the request by some locals that I visit. Had I known it was decorated a discomforting lilac and grey, I definitely wouldn't have.

Prices are low - all main courses are £7.90 with a free drink thrown in. The pub had a pleasant vibe given it was a football night, the gigantic telly was out and the bar full of Stella-drinking blokes - black, white, gay, straight, old, young. The proportion of male to female was about 10:1. We found the pub's comfortable corner - away from the blinding yellow pine of the main bar - by a Victorian cast-iron fireplace where seating is, you guessed it, battered leather sofas.

I do not like hunching over coffee tables to eat, it plays havoc with the digestion - and so did the food. Shared nachos were a slightly burnt tower of tortilla chips smothered in a mess of rich salsa, gooey cheese, squidgy guacamole and refried beans that had not been refried enough - in fact, they could have just come straight from the red kidney bean tin.

Butternut squash soup tasted of water and celeriac, desperately seeking seasoning. Tiger prawn kebabs tasted old and musty but they didn't make me ill - one thing in their favour. An organic beefburger had flavour but Stephie The Stylist found it a bit solid. Some tomatoes on her plate had decent flavour.

The chips were dark brown wedges deep fried, just the once, for a long time - perfectly edible, if not gastronomically ideal. Grilled sirloin steak had no flavour, was tough and had a foul purple sauce with it.

Then again, pudding was perfect. All the hot chocolate soufflé cake needed to improve it was better quality chocolate. A moist, light and trembly sponge with a gooey womb containing molten chocolate for £3.75 is not enough to raise the foodie game. We took off to Harlem in Brixton and consoled ourselves on cornbread and margaritas.

The Far Side
144 Stockwell Road, SW9