Hopeless, of course. He even conducts an auto-interrogation, chiding himself for wasting our time with all this fruitless speculation. Lock's grin, as he leans back on a ticking, outstretched left leg, is cheerily, illogically defiant. He can't win, but that makes him one of the great humorists of our time. "I'm a good hummer," he says. "I could fill the Albert Hall, but people aren't prepared to pay money for that." Book it now and let's see.