The Smurfs 2 - film review

Smurftastic! That means nothing, by the way: in this obnoxiously peppy 3D sequel, “smurf” is an all-purpose prefix that the anaemic script uses when words fail. Which is often.

Viewers scarcely bigger than Smurfs themselves won’t care, or even hear: they’ll be giggling too raucously as the blue terrors travel to Paris to save their adopted sister Smurfette (the hardly rescue-worthy Katy Perry) from the fumbling clutches of bucktoothed wizard Gargamel (Hank Azaria).

Along the way, they get caught up in some nifty chases and, rather less salubriously, Brendan Gleeson’s crotch. “I’ve seen unspeakable things,” whimpers one. Some horrors even Smurf vernacular can’t describe, apparently.