Just being Kate

Kate Winslet on a rare night out at the premiere of Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind

10 April 2012

It's a sunny Sunday morning in Beverly Hills, and Kate Winslet is dressed as if she means business.

Then, peeping under the trouser hem of her razor-sharp, figure-flattering, black tailored suit, you suddenly catch a raffish flash of canary yellow. 'Manolo Blahniks,' she admits, waving towards her famously large feet.

But she adds, half-apologetically, in case anyone should take her for a fashionista, 'My first-ever pair, by the way. I just liked the colour.'

Winslet sends out conflicting signals. She's the no-nonsense, serious, sober-suited actress, with a bright and zany streak.

The ordinary mum, as she likes to keep saying, who happens to have homes on two continents, three Oscar nominations and a power-marriage to the wunderkind stage and screen director Sam Mendes. A meeting with her lurches between impetuous outbursts and defensive attempts at damage limitation.

Jim Carrey, who co-stars with her in Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind, made an intriguing observation. 'Kate is so smart,' he said. 'And the best thing of all is that she's not as tough as she thinks.'

You could call her thinskinned, but it's also surely what makes her an excellent actress. At 28, Winslet could hardly be riding higher, both professionally and personally.

In the new film, she plays Clementine, a flaky, grungy type who changes her day-glo hair colour as often as her underwear. After a turbulent romance with a startlingly subdued Carrey, she has him erased from her memory. Resignedly, he does the same, but, midway through the process, changes his mind.

'I'm much more like Clem than any of the other roles I've played,' Winslet insists, in between quick roll-ups and trips upstairs to feed her brand-new baby. 'Crazy and kooky and silly and nasty and vulnerable.

She was exhausting to play. There were times I'd feel like John Cleese because she just can't keep still and has as much different energy. It was quite scary to have to be so out-there. I was thinking, "How am I going to be able to be that funny?"

Obviously, Jim's the one who's known for playing the funny roles, but I believe that underneath every comedian there has to be a quiet, shy side and I was interested to see how easy it was for him to reveal those parts of himself.'

She claims she has no memories she would like to get rid of. 'I think that all the good stuff and the bad stuff that happens in our lives really forms who we are, and however painful things might have been at the time, I am sort of grateful for those experiences.'

In her case, they would include the death of her first serious boyfriend, the writer Stephen Tredre, in 1997.

Though the couple had split two years previously, Winslet insisted on attending his funeral, despite intense pressure from Fox to appear at Titanic's world premiere. She earned respect for that, and for her decision not to continue coasting down the blockbuster route.

Instead, she did quirky, low-budget projects, such as Hideous Kinky, the film on which she met her first husband, Jim Threapleton, an assistant director.

They had a daughter, Mia, in 2000, but separated the following year. Two months later, she started dating Mendes. Against expectations, that relationship has lasted.

The couple married last May, baby Joe was born just before Christmas and Winslet put in a tearful appearance on US television last month to proclaim her love for her 'wonderful, wonderful' husband. But questions about him are swatted lightly aside. 'Ah! I don't want to talk about that.'

Around the time she fell for Mendes, the media's love affair with her began to cool. Some saw her move from the low-profile Threapleton to Mendes, red-hot from his American Beauty Oscars, as trading upwards.

There has also been her changing size, the final indignity of which came last year when her curves were heavily airbrushed out of a cover photo for GQ .

'I'm like everyone else. My weight goes up and down depending on whether I ate too much over Christmas. It's weird to me that people are so obsessed with the idea of skinny perfection,' she says.

'I've always found magazine shoots so much fun. It's great to travel, there are fantastic clothes and you get your hair and make-up done. When you're a mother and have so little time to pamper yourself, you don't have those opportunities.

'But the GQ thing was extreme. I was really pleased with the original pictures - I was, like, "Wow, I can just stand there in my tights and it looks all right."

So I was freaked out that they felt the need to stretch me and make my stomach concave and lift my arse. I don't buy magazines. I don't have them in my house. More often than not, I see something irritating written about me and I don't want to go looking for that. Who would?'

Instead, Winslet's gaze is directed inwards. She has made it a policy to spend time with her family (Mendes hasn't worked either since their marriage).

'Last night, I was putting Mia to bed and I said, "You know, darling, I have to work tomorrow," and she said, "You don't work, Mummy, you take me to school." I thought, "I must be getting something right." I'm lucky. I'm not missing one bit of this precious growing-up period that doesn't come round again.'

I mention a recent news story about a planned yoga trip and, to my astonishment (although no one has implied she intended to go alone), she explodes with exasperation. 'I'm not taking any time off and that's absolute crap.

These stupid stories are made up and they drive me insane. I've just had a baby and I'm with him every second of the day. I'm a mum - that's my priority. I go to work sometimes, but that doesn't mean that I leave my children behind, you know?' And off she clicks, on her Manolos, back to her wonderful, wonderful family.

Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind opens Fri 30 Apr.

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